Feb. 2nd, 2012 07:45 am
dragonrose36: (Default)
[personal profile] dragonrose36
I've made it a point since I was very young to always act with humility - I sensed long before I heard a certain cartoon character say it that pride was not the opposite of shame, but its source; and true humility is the only antidote to shame. Pride stings when it's cut down; but when I stopped insisting so vehemently that I was right, and couched statements in "I think" or "I believe" it hurt far less when I was proved wrong, and when I was outshone in some area where I fancied myself adept, my humility kept me from humiliation.

This doesn't mean that I take no pride in my work - I do. Very much. But I don't pretend to myself that my work is better than what anyone else can do. I admit freely and happily that there are many writers out there who outshine me, and while I have some natural drawing talent (long since fallen into disuse) my sisters will always be better, because while I sketched as an occasional amusement, they do it constantly and compulsively - they can't help it.

However - and here I come to the point - I find I can't keep my usual humility when it comes to my collage work. I insert here the caveat that collages qua collages are not what I would consider the highest of art forms - at least to my own sense of art. Drawing, painting, and sculpture are superior to collage as far as the medium goes. (The individual pieces may be another matter, but then all art is subjective.) But I have searched and searched for some collagist whose work I feel outshines mine - and thus far I can't honestly say I've found one. I've found a few that I think have the potential, but even they seem to be where I was about five years ago. And the rest all look like a mess. They're not careful with the scissors, there's no sense of flow or care with the layout - a lot of them look to me like someone just dropped a bunch of cutouts on some wet glue and left them like that. And I feel really weird and kind of awful for thinking, as it seems I must, that I'm just the best collagist I've found.

These are some of my collages. If anyone finds some that they believe are better, for the love of the gods tell me so I can get back to my feeling of comfortable competency aspiring to someone else's level instead of feeling like I'm out at the vanguard with nothing guiding me.


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